The Relapse Review

Relapse Yeah hes still that crazy white boy. We know Kim is the Bride of Frankenstein to his Herman Munster (though she’s surprisingly left out on this album). His love/hate/superhate relationship with his moms, heard it…homo hate, check…drug addict tendencies, murder, celebrity castrating…all here. Christopher Reeves! Mariah Carey! You haven’t been forgotten! Just throw in a sprinkle of rape, a bit of incest, a dash of vagina mutilation  and a pinch of stepfather buttfucking sessions and we have the jist of what can be expected from not just Relapse but really pretty much any Eminem CD. eminem_19

And with all of these seemingly psychotic aesthetics attached to the description of this comeback album, the main thing that cannot be denied after all 20 (really 22 counting the bonus tracks) songs have ended is that Eminem at damn near 40 is still literally shitting on these turds in this game that seems to be more satisfied with having stanky legs than crafting timeless albums, well with the cards dealt Em hits the royal flush.

I won’t say it’s his best album, but it is too solid to be denied as at least a piece of the reason why his fans fight for his recognition as one of the greatest to lyrically molest a microphone.  For the people that thought he didn’t have it, or had lost it after the lackluster,lacklovester, lacking period called Encore he’s back to let the world know why he became our favorite trailer park, pill poppin mother’s day poster boy.  eminem with mother

sq_as_cartoon_ssw Unfortunately the talent, skill and genius involved in crafting this banger may get lost in all of the  shizo mayhem caused by his Slim Shady persona, whose point of view is the real point of reference of this album. For those uneducated in the psychosis of Eminem, to put it simply, EMinem is the rapper image, Marshall Mathers is the real person and Slim Shady is the character he’s created as an outlet to let his rage and imagination wild out in the most creative, dangerous and at times frightening ways.

Eminem is relapsing back to that hungrier Slim Shady LP aura, his Slim Shady persona is relapsing back to whats been lacking in his music since Eminem Show (A great album whose lack of edge left it feeling more Marshall than Shady) and Marshall is trying to relapse into the music world while still trying to keep up with the drama that seems to be addicted to his real life.

Where’s he been? La-La Land…literally. But, let’s go track by track…this is a review afterall…

DR.WEST – From track one Em sets the tone of what to expect on the entire album…insanity. Yes, that is the millionth synonym for crazy that I’ve used as an adjective to describe this CD, but for some reason crazy is the word that just keeps jumping at my brain everytime I think of this album.

A Trip Into the Hip Hop side of BATS’ brain:

3080024309Jay-Z ?

BATS BRAIN- G.O.A.T!  mountain-goat

bow-wow-20070331-233427 Bow Wow?

BATS BRAIN- BITCH!….definitely BITCH lassie2

808 808s & Heartbreak?

BATS BRAIN – EMOLIKEABLEPUSSYSHIT…I rocks with it, but still artistically pussy  kanyewestcat128603310142400384

Relapse Relapse?

BATS BRAIN- planters

…yup another adjective, and also figuring in that in this intro track Em, the recovering drug addict, is trying to talk his demonic doctor into helping him follow the proper steps into staying sober, we see that “crazy” is just the tip of this titantic-esque snow cone.

Em’s albums are always so visually commanding that at times it feels as if you’re pressing play on your DVD player rather than CD player or IPOD button, and the extreme cinema is unleashed from the word GO. And yes, to you overly picky sticklerfucks, I know you can listen to CDs on your DVD player, but you get what I’m saying, dude spits movies like a VCR

For those unaware, Em has been gone for the past 4 years because he’s not only been dealing with the tragic loss of his homie Proof and the emotional strain of his seemingly inevitable divorce with Kim, but also a major drug problem. From the onset, we as the listener see how come Slim Shady has no choice but to be let loose with the kind of support a doctor like West provides.

All in all, a thumbs up on setting the stage for…

eminem-blood-bath 3 AM– I ain’t gon front, when I first heard this song, I kinda liked it but didn’t really appreciate it until that creepy, bloody…wait I think I need a few adjective ideas from my favorite white boys

white: “KILLER! whiteboy : SWEET!”

…perfect…but yeah his  killer, sweet horror movie video dropped…

Honestly, when Crack A Bottle and We Made You came out, I was thinking to myself “Is this gonna be an encore to Encore” which is why I didn’t buy the Relapse…Yeah, straight up, I couldn’t bring myself to buy this album, because neither of those set the tone for what I look for ina Slim Shady joint.  I’m not gonna put my money down on anything I’m iffy about, especially these recession 9 to 5, PBS (poor black student) themed days of late.  With Em,I’m either trying to hear some brutal, tear jerking and at times inspirational honesty or some over the top, cartoonish sick shit that the Bill O’Reilly slurping, snooty types can’t see the humor in. Em is one of the few people we’d ever let get away with making this kind of music, and since he does it so well…why the hell not? Nah mean?

You're walking down a horror corridor
It's almost 4 in the morning and you're in a nightmare
It's horrible, right there's the coroner
Waiting for you to turn the corner so he can corner ya, you're a goner
He's onto ya, out the corner of his cornea, he just saw you run
All ya want is to rest cause you can't run anymore, you're done
All he wants is to kill you in front of an audience
While everybody is watching in the party, applauding it
Here I sit while I'm caught up in deep thought again
Contemplating my next plot again
Swallowing a Klonopin while I'm nodding in and out on the ottoman
At the Ramada Inn, holding onto the pill bottle, then
Lick my finger and swirl it round the bottom and make sure I got all of it
Wake up naked at McDonald's with, blood all over me
Dead bodies behind the counter, shit
Guess I must have just blacked out again, not again

The word play is undeniable, its murderously poetic, don’t agree? Check verse 2

Sitting nude in my living room, it's almost noon
I wonder what's on the tube, maybe they'll show some boobs
Surfing every channel until I find Hannah Montana
Then I reach for the Aloe and Lanolin
Bust all over the wall panelling
Dismantling every candle, on top of the fireplace mantling
Grab my flannel and my bandana then kiss the naked mannequin man again

This just the beginning of Slim Shady’s rampage. It’s like Shady has just woke up from hibernation on Track 2 Verse 1 and it’s only going to get more venemous from here. I mean damn the chorus is saying “It’s 3AM in the morning, bodies layin all over the floor” blah blah blah “I must’ve killed em” nuff said right? And as we’re reintroduced to the homicidal cashew that is Shady, that fear of mine that most people will deny his skill and only be wrapped into him talking about jacking off to Hanana Montana (which is only a device to show how crazy the character is as he begins his next murder spree).

Not sure if I feel this as a single, but in the context of the album its our introduction into the mind of the commander of this ship that we’re all currently rocking on…rock on Shady…

eminmom MY MOM- I know I know, another song about his Moms? This Mr.Ed  of a subject has not only been beaten to death, but I believe cremated and its ashes spread all over Neverland’s Dude Ranch. Honestly after Cleanin Out My Closet, what else can be said about Miss Debbie. Well, this is the first thought process when clicking on this song, until I begin realizing that Shady isn’t bashing his Moms this time around, but explaining (from 20/20 hindsight though speaking in 1st person) how he became the argument of his own scorn (Who knows bout that Shakespeare reference? Yah I been reading and shit lol)……Benedick

I’m hoping the Mama topic is over after this album, I understand it, I get it and since this is his comeback, much like when bands are on a comeback tour people like to hear their old songs for nostalgia and reidentification purposes,  yea he’s covering and closing old topics, let’s just hope that this one is closed…

The song itself is catchy, beat gets a bit redundant but the hook stays in the head and his story telling prowess is still in tact… I felt like I was eating the Valium filled potatoes right with Em. At times though I’m wondering if he’s doing enough accepting responsibility on this song, or if he’s just blaming his Mom once again for his emotional state. You can only blame your parents for so long and at 40 the topic’s rust is showing. But, for me, I may be a biased Em fan, because though the topic is old hat, he flips it into a New Era fitted…plus how can you hate on the irony of a Heath Ledger reference coming from an admitted drug addict that use to dress up in a Robin costume and was known for picking on a handicapped Superman?   emrobin

Man I never thought that I could ever be
a drug addict, nah, fuck that I can't have it happen to me
But that's actually, what has ended up happenin
A tregedy; I'm fuckin passin it up, catchin me
And it's, probably where I got acquainted with the taste, ain't it?
Pharmaceuticals are the bomb mom, beautiful!
She killed the fuckin dog with the medicines she done fed it
Feed it a fuckin aspirin and say that it has a headache
"Here, want a snack? You hungry you fuckin brat?
Look at that, it's a Xanax, take it and take a nap
Eat it!" But I don't need it! "Well fuck it then break it up
Take a little piece and beat it before you wake Nathan up!"
Aight Ma you win, I don't feel like arguin
I'll do it, pop and gobble it and start wobblin
Stumble, hobble, tumble, slip, trip then I fall in bed
with a bottle of meds and a Heath Ledger bobblehead

crazyEminem INSANEThe most visually epic and disturbing song on the album. Like, it gets hard to listen to this song and I’m not soft in any way, but when these lyrics assault your ears you don’t know whether to give him props for being so ‘honest’ or being weirded out by such a confession (IF what he’s saying is true at all, or just Shady trying to be outrageous).

From going from the intro, to 3AM, to My Mom to this song, this is the exact point where nothing but adjectives to CRAZY when referring to this album came to mind. Hell the name of this song is INSANE and dude starts the song talking about molestation in full detail and I’m doubting it’s how you think…I won’t even quote anything on this song, you just gotta let it hit you the way it’s meant to…COMPLETELY…OFF…GUARD. One note I will make is that Slim’s flow on the second verse is nuts, dude can really flow anyway he chooses. Lil Wayne better take notice…wayner

MariahCarey-NickCannon103 BAGPIPES FROM BAGHDAD- This is the song that got Nick Cannon’s Wyld ‘N’ Out boxers into a Brady…


“I’m taking full action on you Eminem. I don’t know why no one has stood up to your bitch ass yet. But I guess it’s going to take a corny, wack rapping, boy toy from Nickelodeon to set you straight. And trust, I am going to be relentless. Even though I got a lot of other obligations and occupations, you are my new full time job ‘homey’!”

“I asked myself should I go find this Bitch and just whoop his little ass? Let’s not forget about Eminem’s amateur mixtape rants of calling African Americans Nigger and how he hates “Black Bitches”. How did we let him get away with that in the first place?! He is a natural born racist in disguise. Someone tell this coward that he finally barked up the wrong tree.”

This is my invitation to you, whenever and wherever you like sir. So when you come out of your introverted hiding place and ask your bodyguards if you can go out and play by yourself, I’m here Pimp!”

Yeah Nick Cannon proved his hardcore fighting skills on the streets of Love Don’t Cost A Thing so I guess his threats should be taken to heart. Either way, Nick took down the Anti-Em blog and ended the beef about a week later, he must’ve had a change of heart after hearing this album, or bowed out for fear of getting a drumstick stuck up his ass on Em’s next track.

Nick Cannon:  NICK

“I felt like I said what I had to say, I didn’t take [the post] down, like, Oh, somebody instructed me to do it or anything like that. It was just one of those things, like, I said it.”

“I feel that my relationship with my wife is one of the best things — or the best thing — that’s ever happened to me, and it has nothing to do with celebrity or this industry. It’s all about, you know, just love and finding love and being happy and respecting the union that it is.”

“I never even considered it as beef. It’s not beef. It’s just, Hey, I heard the record. I said what I had to say.”

This mafucka went from being all Tupac’s “Hit Em Up” to turning Lambchop’s Play A Long theme QUICK. Guess reality must’ve set in that there’s nooo way he was beating Em lyrically, and nooo way he could get anyone to believe that he can fight physically…


“We Don’t Believe You, You Need More People…”—Jay-Z

I don’t think Em got much hands either, but c’mon Nick…nicksteve

Nuff said…back to the album….the song is about what you’d expect from Eminem when talking about Mariah. Completely ripping her to shreds in the most romantic way possible, all the while using Nick Cannon’s face for toilet paper, and no not the toilet paper that gets flushed into freedom but the kind still stuck on a nigga’s asshole for a lil while…Sorry Nick..

Christopher Reeves ,Mariah Carey and Britney Spears are basically expected to be cameo’d on every Eminem album, it’s part of his routine at this point. He’s added some Hannah Montana, Nick Cannon and Lindsay Lohan this time around, but he can’t forget about good ol’ Mariah.

One thing is certain, if the rumors are true and he really did smash, it must’ve been the Holy Grail of kitty litters because it’s got Em to mention her on every album afterwards, and Nick “I banged Christina Milian’ Canon to not only marry her but to do this supreme act of pussy whipped idiocy:


I understand that love is love and all, but he only knew this chick for a few months….naaaaaah…..she’s got to make the Erykah Badu ‘I Got That Good Good’ List (others include Kanye’s Ex, Ashanti, LaLa, Eva Longoria, Tiny, Beyonce, Kim Kardashian and Rihanna).

Back to the song, the beat is ok, I’m not really into the arabian style beats but the fun is listening to Nick Canon’s wife and Nick get ripped for basically no reason other than Em’s Slim Shady persona may actually still be harboring feelings from the alleged One Night Stand…I guess this is his way of trying to win her back…

mariah whatever happened to us? Why did we have to break up?
All I asked for was a glass of punch!
You see I never really asked for much
I can't imagine what's going through your mind after such
A nasty break-up with that Latin hunk
Luis Miguel—Nick Cannon better back the fuck
Up, I'm not playin', I want her back, you punk
This is Hello Kitty bedspread satin funk
Mixed with egyptian with a little rap and punk
Zapp and Eric Clapton, Shaft, Frank Zappa, crunk
And yeah baby i want another crack at ya
You can beat me with any spatula that you want
I mean I really want you bad, you cunt
Nick you had your fun, I've come to kick you in your sack of junk
Man I could use a fresh batch of blood
So prepare your vernacular for Dracula acupuncture

he did mention having sex with a pair of conjoined twins on this one too, soo maybe he’s over the situation at this point…maybe

em2…HELLO- I rock with this beat and Slim picked the perfect flows to accompany it. It feels kinda old school, but in a way that even younger cats can vibe to and if they can’t they can go back to listening to Soulja Boy and leave healthy Murder Music to those that can appreciate it.  All in all another song about being on drugs, sounds like dude was doing alotta pills and groupies, even admitting that he aint even have to pay for half the shit, must be the life if you’re Tyrone Biggums at least…


Cool song, but it doesn’t really get truly memorable until the last verse where he’s denouncing the druggie lifestyle in favor of sobriety. Once again, this piece of the puzzle will probably be overlooked in favor of how specific he is in what drugs he wants in the hook. Not one to sell the album, but not necessarily a skip either.

TONYA- One word…Rape…yeah….fareal…

emshower SAME SONG AND DANCE- The Tonya skit leads into this song which is as I said before, about rape…yes, Slim is raping bitches, and as disturbing as its going to come off and as hard as it is to admit the shit, the song is catchy and vibes like a mug. You’ll find yourself bobbing your head to Em rapping about raping and killing women. But not just any women, two of the most famous, paparazzi tabloid hoars in the game.

This is where his tongue and cheek nature takes over and will most likely be the most misunderstood, or possibly understood and still maligned because society says freedom of speech only applies to things that aren’t taboo. Of course Em isn’t a rapist, but Slim is…why? Because like he said on the first song “He Just doesn’t give a  fuck” and we love him for it. Not that we identify with the subject, but moreso we fuck with his rebellion, willingness to shake the system and courage to release something so grating and yet so interesting. Em may be the only rapper that can get away with a song like this, Kanye, Jigga, Tupac, Obama none of em could T-Pain a way to rationalize putting this on their albums…imagine the backlash…

It’s a song about rape, distasteful? Maybe…ite yes…but it’s execution is clever as hell and who he’s deciding to victimize is so outrageous that you know he isn’t serious, he’s fuckin with you because he can….dude is the villian of the story and if we learned anything from drug addict villians this year is that even the most vile  can be appreciated for being so good at being so damn vile…JokerOscar

Not the best song to cut on with a girl in the car….just a thought…


Like I said before, I wasn’t the hugest fan of this song. It represented alot of what I didn’t like about Encore, the weird voice, the nice flow but lack of clever lyrics like better songs of it’s kind (My Name Is, Real Slim ShadY). It’s like dude always comes out w/ one of these zany songs and colorful ass videos when he comes out, and they’ve gotten progressively worst after Real Slim Shady, I mean damn even Stan would agree that ‘Just Lose It’ SUCKED elephant testicles….eminemmic

I can appreciate the word usage and can applaud his assholeness for sexing up Sarah Palin in the song, cuz hell, erybody knows Sarah Palin would get it as well as trying to convince Lindsey Lohan to come back to the hetero side of things

Damn, I think Kim Kardashian's a man
She stomped him, just cause he asked to put his hands
on her massive, gluteus maximus again
Squeeze it and squish it then pass it to a friend
Can he come back as nasty as he can?
Yes he can-can, don't ask me this again
He does not mean to lesbian offend
But Lindsey, please come back to seein men
Samantha's a 2, you're practically a 10
I know you want me girl, in fact, I see you grin
Now come in, girl

I’d have to say that Lindsay’s girlfriend does look like the nigga from Clockwork Orange, so dating Raperman Shady wouldn’t be too much of a step down….Call it overexposure or something because this song usually gets the SKIP.

CLOCKWORK ORANGE GUY >>a_clockwork_orange

Lindsay’s girlfriend>>>>   lindsaygf

eminem_10 The Bret Michaels stuff in the video is funny though…eminembret

MEDICINE BALL– Rawness, flow, lyrics, humor, visuals everything is in sync in this song..EXCEPT THE HOOK, like it’s catchy, but it’s just bothersome for me at least. I just let it slide cuz Slim is slaughtering this track, blowing up vaginas, pissing on Rihanna, killing Madonna and then in the third verse letting Christopher Reeves talk some shit from the grave…the song is sick. It’s enjoyable and that’s what music is suppose to be, its offensive because sometimes being offensive is fun, whose a damn civilized person 24/7,365? If you are, kill yourself because your uptightness is damaging the ozone layer….seriously…

PAUL – Another skit involving the now infamous Paul, Slim keeps the same characters in tact on every album as well. Paul, Steve Berhman, Ken Kaniff…

eminem_the_funeral STAY WIDE AWAKE– This song has been getting some hate on the net I’ve seen and I don’t see why, for me its one of the rawest songs lyric wise on the album. No, scratch that, his flow is vomit scented nasty on this one. But yeah, the content is more of that Slim Shady murder music…it’s like Medicine Ball, but more serious so a piece of you wonders if he’ll really stick an umbrella into some chick’s vagina and open it up…and this feeling is what drives the allure of this song, he’s pulling art from murder. Yeah I know, this dude’s crazy is rubbing off on me, I’m really trying to rationalize why we should accept anarchy on wax…guess there’s a little Slim Shady in all of us

Of course not everyone is going to get it..or anything else Em says for that matter…

OLD TIME SAKE– Sorry, I’m tired of these corny Eminem, Dr.Dre love song duets. Forgot About Dre and Guilty Conscious were them at their most classic and legend making but their most recent outings together have just been boring. Of course it’s obvious that Slim wrote Dre’s verse, and none of the lyrics suck, but he’s ripping too hard on erything else for this to be acceptable…it doesn’t suck, really it’s one of those songs that you gotta be in the mood to listen to, because sometimes I can tolerate it and I love songs with talks of smoking in the hook, but I can’t get with this one, not enough to vouch for it at least. To each his own I guess.

Eminem___Without_Weed MUST BE THE GANJA- Its SUPPOSE to be a weed song, but don’t expect any Devin the Dude type Mary J Sex Songs on this one. The hook is catchy and seems like it’s setting you up for one of those Devin the Dude type Mary J Sex Songs but instead Em winds up murdering mafuckas…AGAIN…lol, once again he forces to respect his creativity in his murder raps, but damn Slim, as a smoker my hopes were up for a Slim weed song. With the care that he puts into his pill poppin episodes I thought I was going to be put right into the head of a pothead and instead got Slim Shady’s POV when, for once, I didn’t want it..hell erybody knows Marshall is the most interesting of all of his personas anyway.  Another beat that’s pretty ordinary for Dr.Dre…don’t get me wrong, I like the song, but the misdirection let the stoner in me down…mm

MR. MATHERS– The drama movie stuff is back, this is a skit that feels pretty authentic, it segways perfectly into the next track

eminembang DE JA VU– Slim Shady has seemed to gotten to high off the ‘GANJA” and it feels like Marshall has come to clue us into his personal life, the kind of song that he usually shines on. In perfect detail he gives us a clear and seemingly honest depiction of what it’s like to walk in the shoes of  a struggling addict that’s trying to balance fatherhood with demon feeding aka addiction. Throughout the entire song you can feel an underlying hindsight present throughout, it’s like while he’s talking airing his mistakes and shed light on where the hell he’s been for the past 4 years you can feel that he’s truly learned and grown alot and it’s not just the same old Slim, shit he’s truly middle aged now where experience is supposeta turn into wisdom.

It's twelve noon, ain't no harm in self inducing a snooze
What else is new? Fuck it what would Elvis do in your shoes?
Now here I am three months later, full blown re-lapse
"Just get high until the kids get home from school homes relax"
And since I'm, convinced that I'm an in-somniac
I need these pills to be able to sleep so I take three naps
Just to be able to function throughout the day, let's see
That's an Ambien each nap, how many Valium, three?
And that will average out to about one good hour's, sleep
Ok so now ya, see, the reason how come, he
Has taken four years to just put out an album, B
See me and you we almost had the same outcome, heat
Cause that Christmas you know the whole pneumonia, thing
It was bologna was it the methadone ya, think
Or the hydrocordone, you hide inside your pornos
Your VCR tape cases, with you Ambien CR, great paces to hide 'em ain't it
So you can lie to Hailie, "I'm going beddy bye Whitney baby good night Elaina"
Go in the room and shut the bedroom door, and wake up in an ambulance
They said they found me on the bathroom floor, damn

Definitely one of the rawest songs on the album, without question (or exclamation).

BEAUTIFUL– This is probably my favorite song on the album, aside from DeJaVu and Underground (Track 20). I’ll get to Underground later, but this song is Marshall being his most poignant. My favorite Eminem song is Sing For The Moment from The Eminem Show and it’s because while listening to it, looking pass the lyrics, passed the beats and all that bottom line I just feel the song. Like I feel what’s being said even when I’m not paying attention to it, so it still affects me, the song can capture you and I fucks with it on that level. And I really love the word “Fuck” so any song where someone says “Don’t let them say you ain’t beautiful” then follows that cliche’ quasi corny statement with “They can all get fucked just stay true to you” as the second part of the hook gets mad props from me, because I feel like the same way..everybody can get fucked either way I’ma do me…shouldn’t erybody? Let’s call it mental masturbation masturbation

Just like De Ja Vu this is Marshall explaining his mindstate, this time with a killer Rock Therapy sample…made me download the original song fareal…could’ve done without the Eminem trademark talking at the end of all the songs like this he does, but hey, he knew he had some heat with this one so I can’t hate on him for wanted to talk, I just wish he wouldn’t have done it during the guitar solo…I mean shit, you put a guitar solo ona song for people to get a scrunched up face and go “oooooo that guitar is rippin it” not to listen to you talk about how beautiful everyone is after killing, raping and forcing us to take pills for a majority of the album. Guess Em’s Tupac is showing…

'Til I stuck my tongue on that frozen stop sign pole at 8 years-old
I learned my lesson and cause I wasn't tryin to impress my friends no mo'
But I already told you my whole life story, not just based on my description
Cause where you see it from where you're sittin is probably 110 percent different
I guess we would after walk a mile in each other's shoes at least
What size you wear? I wear tens, let's see if you can fit your feet

In my shoes, just to see, what it's like, to be me
I'll be you, let's trade shoes, just to see what it'd be like to
feel your pain, you feel mine, go inside each other's minds
Just to see, what we'd find, look at shit through each other's eyes
But don't let 'em say you ain't beautifulllll, oh-ohh
They can all get fucked, just stay true to youuuuuu, so-ohh-oh!
Don't let 'em say you ain't beautifulllll, oh-ohh
They can all get fucked, just stay true to youuuuuu, so-ohh-oh! ...

CRACK A BOTTLE– This is one of those songs that Em, Dre and 50 can do in their sleep and sounds like they did do it from the jammys cuz its…cool…nothing over the top, it was number one and most downloaded seemingly because it was Em’s first song in years moreso than it being anything too spectacular. But shit, in this musical climate that song may win a grammy….

STEVE BERHMAN– The homie was shot on Encore and get in Em’s ass on here…take it for what u want, made me chuckle a bit

eminemjason UNDERGROUND– I HATE THIS HOOK, it’s annoying as hell…BUT Em is murking this track, Em, Slim, Marshall, Ken whoever you want to call him is lyrically raping this track waay harder then Tonya, Britney or Lindsay thought they got it on Same Song and Dance.Beat sounds kinda look a coupla other beats on the album, but shit Em said hes going to jump out the toilet on me while I’m taking a piss, so I can let that slide cuz me and my penis and me have developed a pretty tight knit relationship over the years, wouldn’t want it to be hacked off like the pregnant lesbian missing her legs in his second verse. And who can deny anybody that murders monsters, I mean damn…monsters can get it too Slim??

Captain of a cult with an elite following
To turn Halloween back to a Trick of Treat holiday
Have Micheal Myers looking like a liar
Swipe his powers replace his knife with flowers and a stack of flyers
Hit Jason Vorheys with a forty
Stuck a repository up his ass
And made him tell me a story
Gave Hannibal Elector a fucking nectarine
And sat him in the fucking fruit and vegetable section and gave him a lecture
Walked up elm street with a fucking whiffle bat drew
Fought Freddy Krougar and Edward Scissor hands too
And came out with a little scratch oww
Looking like I got into a fucking pillow fight with a triple fat goose

You just gotta hear it, for yourself. Oh and Ken Kaniff is back on super homo mode with a last minute appearance.


MY DARLING – Album’s over and the bonus tracks come across like 90s Em, not bad at all…shouts out Paul Wall and Bubba Sparxx surprisingly giving them props, but the song’s best aspect is him lyrically fighting with his Demon (Addiction), very compelling…would’ve happily dropped WE MADE YOU or CRACK A BOTTLE for this to be included. Looking back I can see why it was dropped because I cant even think of a place to put this song aside from Bonus. Still worth a listen, more of that Marshall Mathers introspection and with everyone wanting to be everyone else its really sierra mist, fiji water style refreshing to hear someone comfy with just being who they are….as fucked in the head as they may be.

CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR– Another hot one, Marshall sheds light on his other addiction…his dream mixed with a bit of fame. Once again, it’s Em spitting honest raps, the kind that he could give a damn if a fan has a problem with.

I got a letter from a fan that said, he's been prayin for me
Every day and for some reason it's been weighin on my mind heavy
Cause I don't read every, letter I get
But somethin told me to go ahead and open it
But, why would someone pray for you when they don't know you?
You didn't pray for me when I was local
And as I lay these vocals, I think of all the shit I had to go through
Just to get to where I'm at, I've already told you
at least, a thousand times in these rhymes
I appreciate the prayer but I've already got, God on my side

This song reminds me of old more more than many of the songs on the album. It’s him spitting straight up with no gimmicks.

So that’s the album in an eminem-shell, and I don’t mean to be lickin dude’s spatula or nuthin but I was throughly impressed with this one. It’s not for everybody, honestly its really only for Slim Shady fans. Like how The Eminem Show teetered more Marshall, this one teeters more Slim, and after awhile too much Slim can make you wanna pop in some Neyo or something…lol. I hate to sound like an echo of many of the reviews I’ve read, but I’d have to agree that though I like nutso Em, a few more of those Marshall flavored songs would’ve made this album a true classic. I mean much like the tragedy that struck Kanye which had us all listening to 808s and Heartbreak despite the fact that he was a singer that couldn’t sing, all eyes and ears are on Marshall for this one, and maybe Em couldn’t help but hide behind Shady a little while longer while he tries to sort everything out..eminem-pictures-2

If I could pin point it the thing its lacking is that standout track, while all of the songs on here are good…Slim Shady LP had If I Had, Brain DamageMy Name Is and Guilty Conscious…Marshall Mathers LP had Stan, Real Slim Shady and The Way I Am…Eminem Show had Superman, White America, Sing for the Moment and Cleanin Out My Closet…even Encore had Like Toy Soldiers and, uuhhh Rainman? (I liked it at least)…this one may be lacking that couple that will last forever…but who knows Slim said it best in Careful What You Wish for…in the long run its all prolly gon be regarded as classic…

Then called "The Slim Shady LP" the greatest
"The Marshall Mathers" was a classic, "The Eminem Show" was fantastic
But "Encore" just didn't have the caliber to match it
I guess enough time just ain't passed yet
A couple more years that shit'll be "Illmatic"
And eight years later I'm still at it
Divorced, re-married, a felon, a father, sleepin pill addict
And this is real talk, I feel like The Incredible Hulk
My back has been broke and I can still walk

As a fan though what more can be asked for but a hot album, and he delivered, not his best, but back on the right track towards getting there. Makes me wonder that RELAPSE 2 is going to be like. After downloading this one, I can definitely say I’m buying the next one…as long as he doesn’t pull another Encore, because then I’m nominating him to go back in that cave with Yogi and Amy Winehouse.

I never meant this, line to be so offensive
If you weren't so defensive it wouldn't be, you're so sensitive!- Em

Joker Oscar


It's twelve noon, ain't no harm in self inducing a snooze
What else is new? Fuck it what would Elvis do in your shoes?
Now here I am three months later, full blown re-lapse
"Just get high until the kids get home from school homes relax"
And since I'm, convinced that I'm an in-somniac
I need these pills to be able to sleep so I take three naps
Just to be able to function throughout the day, let's see
That's an Ambien each nap, how many Valium, three?
And that will average out to about one good hour's, sleep
Ok so now ya, see, the reason how come, he
Has taken four years to just put out an album, B
See me and you we almost had the same outcome, heat
Cause that Christmas you know the whole pneumonia, thing
It was bologna was it the methadone ya, think
Or the hydrocordone, you hide inside your pornos
Your VCR tape cases, with you Ambien CR, great paces to hide 'em ain't it
So you can lie to Hailie, "I'm going beddy bye Whitney baby good night Elaina"
Go in the room and shut the bedroom door, and wake up in an ambulance
They said they found me on the bathroom floor, damnB

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