Category Archives: GOTHAM NEWS

Fly With Bats isn’t a news site, but I stay up on my news, so I report the news that I care about, if you have similar tastes as me, then this may be the only site you ever need to come to, and you’re more than welcome…yadig

GOTHAM NEWS: Michael Jackson Has a Bastard SON?!


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We all miss the King of Pop Michael Jackson. Honestly, I can’t even say I miss him because his music is still played regularly on radio. Hit an oldies station, listen to it all day and email me your shocked face IF they don’t play at least ONE Michael Jackson song every few hours.  Respect to the king, but let’s be honest, I’m not the only one surprised that none of his children look black. Ok, ok, they’re mixed, but they don’t even look HIS.

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These kids look more like the children Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie got rid of to fit all the ones they wanted to adopt.

C’mon, even if dude did have the vitiligo skin condition, his sperm didn’t!

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GOTHAM NEWS: Lil Boosie’s Lil Bad Ass


While Louisiana rap artist Lil Boosie is the one that should be making headlines for finally being released from prison, it’s his daughter getting all of the attention.

Now the ig’nant side of me sees why people find this funny because it’s so absurd, but isn’t this also where the problem lies? It’s absurd, funny and true that in about 20 years, she’s going to be somebody’s mother. Moment of silence for the generations to come.

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Shouts out to Sagashus

No More Politics As Usual


If you don’t realize that our government is pretty f**ked, then you aren’t living in America, so screw you and your free healthcare, kangaroos, legal weed, public nudity and highways running through office buildings!

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No kidding, Japan has highways running through office buildings! THIS would piss me off at work.

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FLY WITH BATS FLASHBACK: DOWN WITH THE SLAVE MASTER’S SCHOOLS!



DOWN WITH SLAVE MASTER’S SCHOOLS!

The often ignored Louisiana Slave Revolt of 1811 where slaves in the New Orleans area got tired of ‘Massa’s’ sh!t  and decided to go Planter’s style nuts on anyone that got in their way.  They marched from LaPlace, Louisiana to Kenner with nothing but glory on their minds and the phrase “FREEDOM OR DEATH” on their lips.  Now, this post isn’t about that story specifically (That’s what the play is for, at the New Orleans African American Museum, October 13-30th! #promotionTHEsequel), but there’s one main thing that stood out (and one main disgust, that’ll I’ll get to later) to me in my research of the slavery topic.  In our history lessons at school all we are normally taught is that Africans were made into slaves, beat down for decades, maybe a revolt or two happened then Uncle Abe freed us and all of us crayola skinned folk should rejoice and slurp the [andrew] Johnson of Abe and the Yankees for doing us this ‘favor.’

Now, of course as you move onto college and get a bit more educated on the matter you learn that Abe really had nothing to do with freeing the slaves, really it wasn’t even his intent, he was just caring about war and money. Hell, even in the “Emancipation Proclamation” there are areas of the country that were EXEMPT from freeing said slaves. Yes, in the actual document where we are normally taught, but never really read ourselves, that Abe ‘emancipated us’ it’s in writing that he really didn’t:

“That on the 1st day of January, A.D. 1863, all persons held as slaves within any State or designated part of a State that people whereof shall then be in rebellion against the United States, shall be then, thenceforward, and forever free….(blah blah blah)

….Arkansas, Texas, Louisiana (EXCEPT the parishes (counties) of St Bernard, Plaquemnines, Jefferson, St. John, St. Charles, St. James, Ascension, Assumption, Terrebonne, Lafourche, St. Mary, St. Martin, and Orleans including the city of New Orleans), Mississippi, Alabama, Florida, Georgia, South Carolina, North Carolina and Virginia (except for the forty-eight counties designated as West Virginia, and also the counties of Berkely, Accomac, Northhampton, Elizabeth City, York, Princess Anne, and Norfolk, including the cities of Norfolk and Portsmouth), and which EXCEPTED parts are for the present LEFT PRECISELY AS IF THIS PROCLAMATION WERE NOT ISSUED” — The Emancipation Proclamation

Now, I don’t think it takes the smartest man on earth to see that this cat basically freed no southern slaves and seeing as slavery was the biggest and most profitable IN THE SOUTH, why would he really want to elect to slow his money up like that?

If you read the whole document, you’ll see that Abe gave the southern spots a hundred days to keep their slaves on record and then off record basically sat back while the whole southern hemisphere committed all kinds of atrocities to blacks, the biggest, of course, was not really freeing them.  So yeah,  add that with the fact that before the ‘Proclamation’, the government would actually pay slave owners money if they had to kill a slave for revolting, yes, just as if blacks were devices with warranties on them the government would PAY for a replacement if the slave master had to kill a “nigger” for being disobedient, toss this all into the gumbo pot and my proclamation is that the whole Emancipation Proclamation was full of “Ze Sheeit From Ze Bull.”

Honest’ Abe my black a$$, I don’t care if you’re Obama’s homie, honesty is the antonym to politics….

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Don’t let Trayvon Martin become the next Invisible Child! (Yes,ANOTHER #TrayvonMartin Blog)


Under no circumstance should a kid be killed in cold blood. I repeat, under NO circumstances should a kid be killed in cold blood.

UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE SHOULD A KID BE KILLED IN COLD BLOOD.

I was late to get caught up on the Trayvon Martin tragedy and by the time I did it seemed like it had become the “in” thing to talk about. The new “cause”, the ‘I’m so conscious’ topic of conversation. Everyone was raving mad,the bloggers, civil rights activists, reporters, church folk were all in a unified Mufasa flavored uproar. Pictures and posters of the boy started popping up around cities across the country. The story started getting national coverage by everyone worth being reported on….which means, everyone except for Fox News.

Though the Martin case has become a major national news story, Fox News has dedicated relatively little airtime to covering it. As of Monday at noon, the network had aired just one segment on the case, compared to 41 segments on CNN and 13 on MSNBC. — The Huffington Post

And you know the sh!t done got real when Anderson Cooper jumps on it.

So with all of this coverage in turn I decided to not write on the matter because it was getting enough attention. I figured I had nothing new to say and anything that I’d type here would be just added fodder to the growing pile of pissed pigmented people rallying behind our latest cause for action in a nation that STILL assumes that racism doesn’t exist as long as we have Obama. Sometimes I think that there was a sect of white folk that voted for Obama just to say “There, we did that for you…you happy? You got one, no more race cards…debt paid, keep the ‘change’“…Ya know? I remember even reading blogs and seeing interviews from people swearing up and down that now that Obama is President, Martin Luther King, Jr’s dream is finally complete. Really?

Even though MLK did say that he wanted to live in a world where little black kids and little white kids could hold hands and be friends and that IS part of the world we live in now, but I believe that the message he really wanted to get across was a dream of a world without hate. I mean, that’s the only way true peace could reign right? Having a black president is a great step in the right direction but we still haven’t reached our destination. We get caught up in the fact that on the outside, yes…segregation for the most part is done, interracial couples no longer expect to get (literally) stoned when holding hands in public, music isn’t just “black music” and “white music” anymore, black people can sit anywhere on the bus (white people don’t even ride the bus anymore), our Karate Kid and our Spiderman are black, a ‘white’ woman in a sextape with a black washed up R&B singer gives her a longer untalented time in the limelight than a sextape with a washed up white rocker or a washed up white nobody could and both Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson are no where near as pissed as they use to be back when they were relevant, allowing ambulances everywhere to be able to drive just a bit slower than they use to.

Hell even a crazy, alcoholic, public masterbating, nudist white boy can hold all of that crazy white boy zanyness together long enough to get famous for bringing awareness to child soldiers in Africa (KONY: The Invisible Children)…he then, of course lets all of his zany white boy rage out in public, gets caught on camera and is now in rehab..but hey, do you think a crazy, alcoholic, public masterbating, nudist white boy would’ve done that for a bunch of black kids he didn’t know back in the 60s? 70s? Hell, even the 90s?

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GOTHAM NEWS: Will the realest mother in the world please stand up?


Ya’ll remember the story of “The Judgment of Solomon” from the Bible? Two women were fighting over a baby, both claiming to be the mother. King Solomon pulls out a sword, takes the baby and threatens to cut the baby in half so both mothers could have a piece of the child.  One mother was cool with the absurdity, yet the other one said she’d rather the other woman have the baby instead of harming her child. Solomon gives her (the one against Mortal Kombat baby fatalities), who was also the true baby’s mother, the baby and everyone except for the crazy infantslaughtering lady, lived happily ever after.

I always wondered what King Solomon would’ve done if both mother’s would’ve agreed to one side or the other.  If they both would’ve said don’t do it, what does he do? Flip a coin? Invent child custody and visitation rights centuries before it’s time?Slice up the baby anyway and serve it on bun with some goat milk and gravy? Raise up his skirt and see which mother gets “the hint” first?

Or, what if they both agree to cutting the baby in half? Does he do it, because I mean…at least in improv, they always say if you pull out a gun you have to shoot it…maybe he would’ve stoned them both and sold the baby to Merlin or somebody, I dunno…it’s lucky for him that one mother had sense in the situation, or else this story probably would’ve never made it to the Bible (as many stories didn’t).

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